Prayers Please

[Scott Smith]

I put my mom into Hospice care a few days ago. My mom has been ill for quite some time with an assortment of medical maladies, including dementia, liver cancer and congestive heart failure. I am her sole voice, power of attorney, guardian ect, and my decisions have been guided by a medical directive she had drawn up 25 years ago, but that piece of paper has not made any decisions over the last few days any easier whatsoever. Nor has the handfull of relatives who have come out of nowhere to voice their displeasure and opinions and second guess everything I have done and will have to do. Her meds were pulled yesterday, she is now recieving only "comfort care" and "comfort meds". There is no timetable, death keeps its own schedule, it may be days, could be weeks, maybe even months, just don't know yet. She is worn out, broken, but comfortable...I am just broken. Please pray for her, may the end be swift and painless. Thank You..

 

[Bill McElroy]

My thoughts and prayers go out to you and your family Smitty. That's gotta be as hard as it can be anyway, without having relatives getting on your case. Just tactfully remind them,.."Mom has left me in charge and we have ALL of her wishes and direction's duely noted,..but thank you for your concern!!" They'll get the hint.



Holler if you need anything!!

Mac

 

[Greg. Avery]

Prayers are on the way for both your Mom & you. Mac hit it on the head with the relatives. God bless

 

[Scott Hammer TOXIC]

Tough situation Smitty. Do what you know she would have wanted and be at peace with it.



TOXIC

 

[Barry Dufour]

Prayers coming up from Cajun land. I went thru the same thing with my mother. You are doing the best you can. Don't let others bother you. This is what she wanted. Take care.



Barry from Louisiana

 

[Scott McCubbins]

Prayers for you and your mom.

 

[Tornado]

Lots of empathy, we've gone thru it with both my wife parents and mine. You'll definately be in our prayers.



Jim

 

[Marty Klein]

Holding a good thought Smitty. I know those medical directives don't make any of the decisions easier. I share the following with you only for your information and consideration if appropriate. Two years ago my Mom left my sister Kate in your exact situation. Kate was faced with a decision that made her uncomfortable and under pressure kate didn't heed my Mom's wishes. Mom was then faced with two years bedridden and living the life that my Mom was trying to avoid. Now, Kate is living with what she thinks was a failure to my Mom and us. And finally, we must always do what our mothers say.

 

[Randy Walls]

Smitty I can empathize with you. My dad had a directive written up and it was extremely hard to follow it as it is your parent.



All went well and the last time dad came to from the comfort drugs, he thanked us, told us loved us and then went to sleep to never wake up again. He looked happier and at peace that last time. I hope all goes as well as it can for you and your mother.



Randy!

 

[Texas Transplant]

As others have said, this is a process that is difficult at best. My wife went through this two years ago, and I tried to be as supportive as possible. Try not to let the 'naysayers' get to you and keep your spirits up as much as possible. The wishes of anyone (especially our parents and family members) should be followed.



Tex

 

[Phillip Sexton2]

God give you and your mom comfort. He has it under control. My dad left 12/26/10 at 10:45pm. He went out like a feather falling. I understand you pain and God does even more.

Look to him.

 

[Ken Sabin]

I had to do the same thing 7 yeaqrs ago, My Mom was in Hospice care. And, like you, my only concern was her comfort. I just didnt want her to be in any pain. And I had relatives trying to tell me what they wanted me to do. But, I stuck with what Mom wanted, and if I may say so myself, am quite proud of that fact. When her time came, she passed, quietly, and what appeared to be peacefully. Like others have said, it doesnt make it any easier at the time, but in the long term, I am quite sure I did the right thing, knowing that I was doing what she wanted.

 

[Carlos Hathcock III]

Hang in there Smitty. Know that you are doing the best you can and what you feel is the right thing is the right thning for you all. It is always easy to second guess hard decision....

 

[joseph currier]

smitty,

sounds like your mom is a special person to be so thoughtful as to leave some kind of directive in place for you to follow,

i'm sure she intended to remove as much guilt from you as is humanly posible.

so remember her with the thought of how much she loved you.

and to those whom would question i'd say walk a mile in my shoes, and remind them it could be them that dies a terrible death if not for the mercy of their loving family.

your doing good work my friend and god knows it is hard.

my prayers are with you and your family at this difficult time.

god bless

 

[Charlie Carter]

We are praying for the both of you and your relatives. As long as you are doing what she wanted done, don't worry about what other people think. You can't please them all, and shouldn't try.

 

[Scott Smith]

Thank You everyone..Your kind words mean a great deal..

 

[Bob G.]

Smitty,



Prayers on the way for you and your family.

 

[ND Bass]

It is never easy my friend. My dad passed away 23 years ago due to cancer and my brother passed away with brain cancer about 2.5 years ago. My brother was in hospice and I have nothing but great things to say about hospice.



Praying for you. Remember, it's always easier to criticize someeone else than be the responsible party. It's easy to be an arm chair quarterback.

 

[Gilbert Scales2]

Smitty, prayers sent for you and your family.



Bubby

 

[Sue DeLelys]

Smitty,



Prayers sent for your Mom and for you. Although I have not been in your situation, I was with my Mom when she had to make the same decisions for my Dad. Stay strong.



Sue

 

[Bruce Freeman]

Prayers to you and your family.

BF

 

[Dan J.]

Prayers sent for your Mother and your whole family. God Bless you all.

 

[fatrap]

Amen to what Mac said. I went thought this a year ago last Oct. It's very difficult. My thoughts are with you. You have done the right thing.

fatrap

 

[Bruce Yeaton]

I'm sorry to hear about your situation Smitty. It makes my problems look like a carnival ride.

Stick by what your mom wants and hold your head up high.

 

[Greg Meyer]

Smitty,



You have done what your mother wanted... Your helping her not others. Prayers sent for you and your family.