TOP 5 SMART ASS ANSWERS FOR 2004...according to
> > Reader's Digest:
> >
> > Smart Ass Answer #5:
> > A flight attendant was stationed at the departure gate
> > to check tickets. As a man approached, she extended
> > her hand for the ticket and he opened his trench coat
> > and flashed her. Without missing a beat....she said,
> > "Sir, I need to see your ticket not your stub."
> >
> >
> > Smart Ass Answer #4:
> > A lady was picking through the frozen turkeys at the
> > grocery store, but she couldn't find one big enough
> > for her family. She asked a stock boy, "Do these
> > turkeys get any bigger?" The stock boy replied, "No
> > ma'am, they're dead."
> >
> >
> > Smart Ass Answer #3:
> > The cop got out of his car and the kid who was stopped
> > for speeding rolled down his window. "I've been
> > waiting for you all day," the cop said. The kid
> > replied, "Yeah, well I got here as fast as I could."
> > When the cop finally stopped laughing, he sent the kid
> > on his way without a ticket.
> >
> >
> > Smart Ass Answer #2:
> > A truck driver was driving along on the freeway. A
> > sign comes up that reads, "Low Bridge Ahead." Before
> > he knows it, the bridge is right ahead of him and he
> > gets stuck under the bridge. Cars are backed up for
> > miles. Finally, a police car comes up. The cop gets
> > out of his car and walks to the truck driver, puts his
> > hands on his hips and says, "Got stuck, huh?"
> >
> > The truck driver says, "No, I was delivering this
> > bridge and ran out of gas."
> >
> > AND NOW........FOR .................THE..........
> >
> > #1 SMART ASS ANSWER OF THE YEAR
> > 2004........................
> > A college teacher reminds her class of tomorrow's
> > final exam. "Now class, I won't tolerate any
> > excuses for you not being here tomorrow. I might
> > consider a nuclear attack or a serious personal injury
> > or illness, or a death in your immediate family, but
> > that's it, no other excuses whatsoever!" A smart ass
> > guy in the back of the room raised his hand and asked,
> > "What would you say if tomorrow I said I was suffering
> > from complete and utter sexual exhaustion?"
> >
> > The entire class is reduced to laughter and
> > snickering. When silence is restored, the teacher
> > smiles knowingly at the student, shakes her head and
> > sweetly says "Well, I guess you'd have to write the
> > exam with your other hand."
> >
